Embracing the Pause…
/Change moves incrementally from breath to breath and moment to moment, allowing for course-correction along the way. – Sharon Weil
"It is important to embrace the pause: to create quiet space so we can hear God’s voice. If our tongues are wagging, we can’t hear anything but ourselves." – Anne Lamotte
In my sermon last week, I shared a story about re-learning the art of hand carving soapstone during my spiritual "Dark Night of the Soul" (which segued into the tragedy of the pandemic- just as I began to find the ground). Carving soapstone reminds me of sitting in the sawdust in my Grandpa Noel’s basement in his workshop where he was always turning wood and making household repairs. It is a place I remember with great fondness.
During my “Dark Night of the Soul” (think of it as the ultimate spiritual “course correction” in Christian mystical tradition) in 2019 and early 2020, my physical and emotional pain was debilitating on some days as I seemed to be purging every grief, loss, abandonment and rejection fear in my psyche so I could move into a higher and deeper relationship with God. Carving offered me an oasis- a safe place as I lived “breath by breath and moment by moment.” It allowed me to press the "pause" button on my pain and anxiety. Carving gave me joy through my purging tears and (ultimately) Holy struggle on days I could barely summon the energy to get out of bed.
As this pandemic season drags on and evolves, carving has continued to be sacred work for me. It has become a way of connecting with my Shawnee ancestors, and an act of participating in creation with God in Mishe Moneto (Grandfather Sky), and Kokumthena (Grandmother Earth) that gives me joy. Even this week, after several days of working on a carving project that started with a random chunk of ugly grey looking soapstone that I pulled out of the bulk bag from Etsy, that joy welled up in my heart as the beautiful seafoam and sage green undertones began to emerge in the wet sanding process. Those of you who make things with your hands know there is nothing like that when it happens. It is an experience of standing on Holy Ground.
Following Anne Lamott’s excellent suggestion that we all “embrace the pause” as part of our course correcting toolkit, I invite you to talk it over with God and find ways to use the pause button in your life. God waits for us there. And you don’t have to wait for a Dark Night of the Soul to take you to the ground. You can build your spiritual muscles now; whether it is through walking outdoors, crocheting, taking photos, knitting, painting, building models, sitting down to call a friend, zooming with the kids, working a crossword puzzle, reading a book, or scratching your cat’s ears when they land in your lap- embrace the pause. Embrace it as prayer. And let it give you peace and make your heart sing.
You’all continue to bless me as I serve as your Minister & Teacher. No matter what terrain we find ourselves navigating personally or communally on the journey, may we all find ways to “embrace the pause” in our lives so God can show up and abide with us there. I look forward to being with you on Sunday. May the peace and joy of God that passes all understanding fill up your pausing hearts in coming days and open them just a little wider.
Love and Blessings. -Rev. Jeanne